The good & not so good!

Tonight was a blast. Me, Clarissa, and Michael brought Clarissa trick-or-treating since he is working tomorrow night. We got a good bit of candy at least for one child we did. We stayed out about 90 minutes or so which was all we could tolerate. Not only did we drive 1 hour each way for trick-or-treating but adding the 30 degree temp in the mix was not fun. Needless to say i think we will all get sick in the next few days.. not that we didn't dress warm it was just too cold and add the wind chill and it was horrible. We did have a good time though and had a lot of walking we did. Clarissa was so cute at some houses at first she wouldn't even get out of the stroller and then she started to warm up to the idea. So about the 6-7th house she actually got out of the stroller and walked up to the houses and picked out her candy.. to bad my daughter doesn't know what take ONE means lol but it's all good she is just a kid and im sure the people giving out candy understood that.

A few houses did scare her because they had huge witches and stuff sitting on chairs i wish i could have gotten some pics it was priceless but unfortunately i didn't and i'll get to that next. Julia is going trick-or-treating tomorrow with Craig's family. And i know they will take lots of good pics for me to see and i know Julia will have a blast!

As far as the "NOT SO GOOD" ehh before we left the house today i grabbed my digital camera to take pics.. well i turned it on and all i got was a white screen with some black lines through it. So my camera is BROKEN.. after only 8 months. I called the manufacturer and it IS covered under warranty because it is not a mistake i made but probably a camera error. But he looked up the serial number and the camera was mfg over a year ago even though i bought it 8 months ago. So there is NOTHIN they can do for me without a receipt. Well i didn't save a receipt from 8 months ago. So im going to find another way around returning it or i'm just going to shop ebay for a better deal but a different camera for sure. BLAHH whatever i was pretty dissapointed that i couldn't take pics tonight nice timing huh? But anyways i came home and found out if i take pics even though i can't see the pics im taking or them on the screen at all they still work when uploaded to the computer lol gay huh? But im going to bed it's been along night. Happy Halloween!

The kids fun-filled day!

My little Ladybug

My little Cinderella

The kids had an absolute blast today. This morning they had their flu shots *the worse of the day* and then their pediatrician had a little halloween things for the kids.. well i should say the office. The office was dark and decorated and basically at every corner one of the employees was dressed as something different and handed out different things such as candy, balloons, and pencils and so on. The kids LOVED IT. Unfortunately, i forgot my camera. After we left there we went and picked up some produce and fruit and a farm not to far from here. Then we left and the kids went to see and feed the goats but dumb me did forget the camera.

I did get some pictures of the kids where we came home though. I picked up a chicken pot pie at the farm so we are having that for dinner. I hope the kids like it. Julia just went into the refridgerator and helped herself to a yogurt wonderful learning already to go in the fridge and in the silverware draw to get what she wants oh boy am i in for some trouble.

I should add that i am starting a new term at school on Tuesday. I am going to be taking medical ethics and law (which i heard that class is awesome) and im going to be taking medical coding and billing i heard that one wasn't so hot. I just got done my medical terminology class and my information processing class. It looks like with my medical terminology class i will pass with a B or so and my information processing class i will pass with an A- which is awesome!! Only thing that sucks about a new term is meeting new people all over again but luckily i know some of the people that will be in both classes as they were with me last term lol.

but anyways here is some pics.

The last few days

Well today has been along stressful day i am just glad it is almost over. Tonight i decided to sit down and watch the scooby doo movie with the kids. They loved it.. Julia sat still most of the movie which was suprising but Clarissa was up & down but i wasn't suprised with that. Tomorrow or Friday i am planning on going shopping for more pants for Julia and some footie PJ's for the kids! I just loved those things the time of year when it starts getting cold outside. At some point too we are still going to the pumpkin patch. It's just a matter of when exactly. Yesterday we brought the kids to the park but unfortunately the camera died after like 4 pictures lol. They had fun though but didn't want to leave but it was pretty chilly outside. Here is a few pictures from the last 2 days.

Halloween Shopping

That is what we did yesterday. I did a search around and i came up with Cinderella for Julia and Clarissa will be a ladybug. Both costumes are adorable!! I got them at Target. Clarissa's costume comes with the wings and a headband thing too!! Julia's is just the dress and a Cinderella bracelet. I just have to get Julia's crown and tights and shoes and Clarissa i have to get tights and shoes for. I hope the weather isn't too cold considering it has been chilly out.

Tomorrow i am planning on making the kids some Halloween cupcakes since they have been begging me for them hehe. And some chocolate chip muffins maybe. My kids cannot wait until Halloween! Here is miss. cinderella and ms. ladybug.

How much can i possibly take?

Well.. i get a call on Monday that Julia's dad is going away on buisness and his parents are also "too busy" to take their grandaughter. Mind you i have her 20 days out of the month.. he has her only 4 days since his parents always have her 4 days. So he picks her up around wed night and drops her back home around sun evening. Well, apparently he is being sent away for buisness so Julia isn't going with him this week. He wants to do next week but if the trick or treating is here next week he can forget it because next week was supposed to be "my weekend" he is such a jerk.

Things have been quite difficult lately, i've been depressed and more tired than ever. My thyroid level is screwed up again and i feel like a zombie. Granted, i do my parenting cleaning, cooking, bathing, the kids, putting them to bed. But i can barely do it because im so tired and well it's just depressing me. Not to mention money is really tight lately. I mean i am not currently working and hubby isn't making a whole lot of money. Our bills seem to be more than what we are making. We are really JUST getting by. I don't think me trying or even thinking about getting pregnant is a good idea right now. I've been thinking about it more and more... and i know my depression will just get worse if i was to have another baby. I'm supposed to have an appointment with a fertility specialist since we have not prevented for 19 months and im still not pregnant.. but i know she won't have anything good to say. Maybe we should just focus on getting things under control financially and emotionally before we think about brining another baby into this world. My world lately feels upside down. I feel like a bad mom because all i want to do is sleep all day. I feel bad that i can't afford to do more things outside the home with my kids.. i feel like they are always cooped up in the house because of me. It's hard to cope and deal with at this point. I'd like to bring them to the farm tomorrow or a pumpkin patch even if it means me spending $5.00 we do not need to spend $100.00 to have a good time and take memorable pictures. Tomorrow i am also doing food shopping and picking up the kids Halloween costumes.. something for them to enjoy also.

Soooo.. im thinkig more and more about candidates for the election this coming month. To be quite honest i don't like either candidates but i'm planning on voting and im leaning more towards Obama/Biden. Point blank is that McCain and his VP i forget her name is Republican obviously and they only care about keeping war in Iraq and making the poor people poorer and the rich people richer. And personally i don't think they have a good enough strategy for the economy being in crisis and people not having health insurance like (me) so that's a definite important topic to me and millions of other americans not even cutting $40,000/year.

But i guess im done speaking for now just figured i'd get my feelings out there. I like my blogs to show the real "us" and not just the good things. It's always good to be able to speak about life and face it head on.

It's been one of those days...

Well me and hubby talked things out and are willing to give things another go. We will see what happens with time. Julia is going back to the drs tomorrow she has had a cough now for 3 weeks! Poor thing. Today me and Michael went out and got Clarissa her toddler bed it's a pink sleigh bed it's adorable. Hubby is going to put it together tomorrow. I found Julia laying down on a pillow today with her friend at school playing it was adorable. When she saw me peeking at her she got up real quick and came and gave me a big hug that is always something to make you tear.

I also got my haircut yesterday. It's rather short but i like it... Hubby likes it too so thats always good. lol My diet has been going really well too woohoo im now down 5lbs!!! Im so happy with that because i accomplished that in 5 days! Just by basically changing my eating habits.

School updates too... my 3rd quiz in my medical terminology class i passed with an 81.5 which is much much better than i would have thought. Our midterm is take home and optional so im going to do it i think just to get my average up. Well im off to play monopoly on pogo and to clean here is julia posing tonight for pics.. she just loves taking pictures lol

Life and Me

Well this is my first blog.. im just trying to figure this thing out so bare with me. My kids are still awake they think they are too good for naps anymore. I just know im gonna go bonkers tonight, especially with 2 overtired children. Julia has been going to school. She is one smart cookie she's been coming home with drawings, and things she made in school and she did such a good job!!! When she came home from daddies this weekend she did some painting and got almost ALL of it within the lines i was amazed!! She is sooo smart i cannot believe she is turning 4 years old in November it's hard to believe because time has just gone by so quickly. Clarissa is my little diva.. she rules the world at 2 years old.. she knows best (So she THINKS) lol she is a smart little girl she is talking in sentences now that is pretty amazing for a 2 year old huh?? I love these little girls so much!!! They are the only think that makes me happy in life right now.

My husband is a jerk, i want him gone.. we've been having problems for years now. I just chose to keep things bottled up until last night i just went off. It's hard being with someone that doesn't love you or treat you with respect. He can say a million times he loves me but it doesn't mean he means it because if he did we'd have a happy marriage for the most part. Sometimes i feel like the only reason he is here is because of his daughter. I kicked him out last night and he came back because it was cold out so i told him to come back in and sleep on the couch and he did. Today he's been trying to apologize all day and beg and plea for my forgiveness and for us to work things out even if that means therapy but we will see what happens with that.. i just don't think i can do it anymore i don't ever believe the sayings that opposites attract because that certainly isn't our case. MY blogs will be very interesting as you can tell. Stay tuned more to come tomorrow... i know this is alot for a first blog but hey that's life right...